After nearly 40 years in sales in the structural wood component industry, and with countless trusses and wall panels behind him, Jay Halteman has nevertheless summarily been shown the door – and by his own two progeny, to boot.
His long, tiresome and haggled-over retirement is effective June 30th.
Displaced at work by his own son and daughter, the siblings have sent their father off to accept his fate, reporting to wife Cathy. “Apparently, greener pastures actually do await me,” said the elder Halteman, nervously chomping at the last recognizable shreds of what used to be fingernails. “At least, that’s what I’ve been led to believe.” Halteman added, “How was I to know that this green field had nothing to do with a site for a new truss and wall panel facility? I mean, just look at it – it’s got so much potential!”
A lackluster retirement party with stale cookies and some sort of punch is “not exactly the sendoff I was hoping for,” admitted Halteman, while also noting the sad and unmistakable irony that it roughly coincides with Father’s Day. Halteman was nonetheless duty bound to confirm to skeptical onlookers the inevitable change, stating “today and from now on, we’ll no longer offer one discontinued item I always believed in – me.”
As for the greener pastures that still may somehow prove to exist and bear fruit, Halteman says he eagerly looks forward to the new endeavors and adventures that await. “I’m gonna be the best housekeeper we’ve ever had, and I look forward to continuing my mastery of heavy machinery with the washer, dryer, dishwasher, and that other thing below the stovetop that cooks stuff.”
Pausing for a moment of quiet reflection, Halteman remarked how grateful he is for the many valued customers, colleagues, and industry friends who’ve been such a big part of Wood Tech Systems’ success. “My great appreciation for so many people and associates in this wonderful industry who’ve helped shape our small but mighty company runs deeps and will last forever,” adding wistfully, “the pride and satisfaction I’ve gained is something I’ll carry with me wherever I go, from the kitchen to the garage to the shed and back to the kitchen again.” Asked what he’ll miss most of all, Halteman choked back tears while stammering out, “people who’ll pretend to laugh at my jokes.”