When I was little, being a fireman was never something I considered (see When I Grow Up from last month), but as a little girl there was the option to become a beauty queen. Watching the pageants on TV, I knew I had the self-confidence and talent to compete with anyone. But there was one specific reason I could not enter a big competition — the contestants always had to walk down an open flight of stairs on stage without hanging onto anything!
The Things We Fear
It’s silly, I know, but following a traumatic experience on a hiking trail as a child, I developed a fear of falling. I am not afraid of heights — in fact, I loved a helicopter tour of Sedona and someday plan to see something from a hot air balloon. With the right safety gear, I’d be up for a zipline too. What I fear is falling off anything that looks like a precipice, so the top of a staircase without a handrail will stop me in my tracks. To this day, when rushing around my home, sometimes I will stop cold in my tracks at the top of my second-floor stairs, because just for a minute I will have to make a conscious choice to begin the descent carefully and deliberately. Once I’ve started the descent, I can pick up the pace and charge down the rest of the stairs. It is only that first step off of the ledge that vexes me.
Overcoming Our Obstacles
With another New Year on the horizon, I’ve begun thinking about things I might like to change or improve. There are the things that I cannot control, such as my sister’s cancer, but there are things that I can attempt to control, such as my reactions to stressful situations. I may never cure my fear of falling, but I try not to let it stop me from doing things. To date, it has only cost me a little extra time and, of course, a pageant crown. But that’s okay, would that all of our obstacles could be so trivial.
Wishing Everyone a Wonderful Holiday Season and a Joyous New Year!