Building a strong employer/employee relationship is probably one of the biggest challenges that leaders face in any organization. I have never met any manager or leader of any company who does not want to improve in this area. There are so many books, seminars, and other resource materials available to help guide a person to the correct approach to create the best employer/employee relationship as you possibly can in your organization, but the key to them all is working on it.
My goal in this article is to share with you my story and how I have attempted to improve my relationship with the employees of every company I have managed over the last 35 years. No one is perfect in this area (certainly not me) and no one I have met has all the answers when it comes to this topic, but I trust that something I say in this article will help you in some way to improve your relationship with your employees.
What we learn when we're younger
I grew up in the late 1960s and 1970s in Texas. My mom and dad taught me to respect others and to respect my elders. My dad was a truck driver and my mom was a secretary, but the only thing I knew about my parents’ boss at work was that he was the boss and they did what he told them to do. The most I learned about being a boss as a kid was being cast as Ebenezer Scrooge in our 5th grade school play.
My first management job was having my own work station at a truss plant. That was early 1984 at ABO in Mabank, Texas, and I was 19. I was a very driven person who wanted to have the best numbers every day in the plant – so I drove everyone who worked for me so hard for 8 to 10 hours that no one wanted to work at my station. I was able to do fairly well with my numbers and my quality, but I found myself retraining people all the time because every time anyone got the opportunity to get off my station, they took it quickly.
After moving to Broken Arrow, Oklahoma in 1985 to attend the Rhema Bible Training Center, I started working for Rawick Manufacturing and quickly became the night shift foreman. My management tactics did not change much, however. I got the numbers, but I was doing almost everything myself because I felt that no one could do it as fast or as good as I could and, frankly, the employees could care less about my daily goals and they just wanted to get away from me as fast as they could.
I could not understand it.
Why were people this way? My mom and dad went to work all my life, did what the boss told them to do, came home, and everything was fine.
That all changed for me in 1986 when I met Abner Yoder from Stark Truss. Stark purchased the Rawick plant and I began working for them. Abner asked me to come to Canton, Ohio when I graduated and go into management training. The lessons I learned during my 23 years at Stark is what I have built my management philosophies around to this day.
The good people who influence us
Before I get to the 6 top lessons I’ve learned, I would like to tell you a little about Abner and Esther Yoder. When I first started at Stark, I quickly saw that no one really worked for Stark Truss. They worked for Abner and Esther. The reason that everyone felt that way was because that’s how they made you feel.
On my first trip to Canton, Ohio to look at the area and decide if I wanted to move and enter the management training program, my wife Kary got very sick. Abner and Esther took us to the doctor and then had us stay at their house. My wife was in bed most of that weekend.
The first morning my wife woke up in Abner and Esther’s guest room, there was a red rose placed on the night stand so it would be the first thing she saw when she woke up. Esther had made a special trip out to get that rose and placed it there while we were sleeping.
At that time, Stark was one of the top 4 truss plants in the United States. Yet, somehow, the owners made the time to do something like this for a 22 year old kid and his wife. Remember, I was just the guy running the night shift in one of their locations. Who does that?
During all my years at Stark, I saw the leadership of Abner and Esther in action all the time. They really loved all their employees and we knew that. They got involved in our lives, knew our kids by name, and we just always felt that they had our best interests at heart.
Many times after hard meetings, I would get a call around 8 or 9 at night and it would be Abner. He would tell me not to worry about the situation we were discussing – I was doing a good job and he was thankful that I was a part of his team. Those phone calls meant more to me than anything else he could have possibly done.
When my son Daniel was 6 or 7, we were all at the Stark Truss annual softball tournament and Daniel and his friend were at the concession stand when Abner walked up. Abner said to them: “Let me buy you boys a hot dog.” Daniel looked at his friend and said: “It’s ok, my dad works for him and he likes my dad.” I could tell story after story about how Abner and Esther treated all their employees and so could thousands of other Stark past or current employees.
My top 6 daily questions
Taking what I have learned throughout my career, I approach business differently than when I was a kid. Now, I begin with questions I ask myself daily to attempt to strengthen my relationship with my employees. These are my top six.
- Do I really care about my employees or am I just trying to convince them I care?
You cannot fake this, so you have to ask yourself every day what you are doing to show your employees you care. When was the last time I bought a hot dog for one of my employee’s sons? When was the last time I called an employee at 8 or 9 at night just to tell them how much I appreciate them? These are the types of questions I ask myself daily. Yes, some days I fall short on these things, but I am trying.
- Could I work for myself?
This is a question I ask myself every day. How do I handle positive or negative situations with employees? If I were them, how would I feel with the way something was handled?
- Am I willing to have good, open debate with my employees about any issue?
Are my employees comfortable coming to me and discussing any subject that may be concerning them? I really thought I did this well until one time I was at a plant facility and I asked the manager what was wrong with him. He seemed very upset and not talking much, and frankly it was beginning to be an issue with our relationship. He asked me if he could be honest with me and I, of course, said yes. He then said that he does not sleep the night before I am coming down, because he just thinks that he can never do enough and, no matter what he does, it is never good enough. I was shocked and made sure I worked on my end to fix that. He was a top performer, so if I was making him feel that way, then it was my fault and I had to do whatever I needed to do to fix it. He and I went on from there to develop one of the best relationships over the years that I have with anyone who has ever worked for me, and we are still close friends to this day.
- Am I willing to give up my way for the best way?
I have found many times that my employee has the best answer for most situations if I am willing to adjust my thoughts and allow them to flourish in their area. At the end of the day, they have to own it anyway for it to be successful, so if they don’t believe in the solution or procedure, it will never get done. This is something where Abner was a master. He gave me and others the entire field and let us run, only keeping us in the boundaries of the field as needed.
- Do I tell my employees the truth about their performance or do I let it go until it becomes unsolvable?
Many employers have a hard time telling their employees the truth about their performance until something has gone on so long that, when you deal with it, you are letting them go. I do my best to never let that happen. It is very hard sometimes, but in the end I have found that often they are not aware of the issue, so they fix it and become very productive employees. Although other managers may take the approach that something will work out in time – either the employee will change or leave/be fired – so why deal with it, I think the best answer is to deal with the small things daily so they do not become big things later.
- Have I placed all employees in positions where they can succeed?
I have a framed picture on my office wall with a quote I heard in a meeting many years ago: “The greatest tragedy is for a man to live his entire life and not accomplish the purpose for which he was born.” I have a firm belief that every person has some special gift or talent that can help any organization where I am involved, and it is my challenge to identify positions where each employee has the best chance of using their skills to help both the organization and themselves succeed. I have been able to give opportunities to many for leadership and management roles throughout my career, and I have also been able to redirect a person into another area of the business if they were struggling to perform in an area I had put them. Seeing everyone succeed and reach their goals in life for themselves and their families is, without a doubt, a high point of my career.
As I said in the beginning, everyone has their story and has their own opinions on this subject. I trust that what I have shared can help some develop a stronger employer/employee relationship. We are all striving to be the best we can be in all areas of our businesses, and my hope is that any thoughts we can share with one another at any time will help us all achieve the best possible results for all our organizations.
Thanks for allowing me to share my thoughts.
Starting as a high school graduate working for Tom and Bart Whatley (ABO–Mabank Texas) in 1983, Don Groom’s career in the industry has taken him through four states and five companies, including 23 years at Stark Truss Company. Currently, Don is the managing partner and CEO of TrussWorks LLC in Caldwell, TX.